So Sorry

So sorry to those who have been waiting for ch7 but since LN came out I was spending time play the game and also I have been having a lot of issues with my game and have lost so many saved games due to major freeze ups and not know how to fix it. I am so worried about losing this saved game that I'm scared to load it up until there is a fix for it. I dont want to give up on this story and hopefully I will be able to continue soon.

Chapter 6 Here Comes the Bride and a Surprise

Again sorry for the lateness of this chapter but my children brought in yet another cold bug and I've been ill all week again as well as uber busy leaving no time or energy to get my story out.

Chapter 6

The Day of my wedding came around so fast, I was so excited. In the weeks up until the day I had felt so ill and exhausted but I didn't want to worry Moe so I just keep it hidden "its just nerves and working to much, I'll be fine when the weddings over" I told myself, to keep myself going. We picked a small church in Barnacle Bay to get Married and invited only a few people. It was so sad that Moe's dad wasn't able to come but he wasn't well enough to leave the house. Moe set up camera's all over the place so he could edit it and show him everything about the day. 

I chosen a simple yet pretty wedding dress with blue lace lining the top and the back of the dress. As soon as I saw it in the shop I knew it was perfect. I borrowed a beautiful sapphire necklace of Mary Soto's to complete my outfit, it was her mothers and as we had become close friends she offered to lend it to me. I was so choked up by her kindness. So I had my something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue.  The only thing that made me sad was I wouldn't have my father to give me away on my wedding day but that morning I visited his grave just to tell him about the church and my dress and I felt a little better.

As I entered the church all my nerves melted away, I was the happiest woman alive and stood right there at the alter was the most amazing man in the world and he was going to be my husband. As soon as the music started he looked up and his jaw dropped, I had to laugh at that point but I managed to keep it quiet. As I reached him he whispered in my ear "Wow". As we stood there listening to the minister we just looked at each other like there was no one else there. 

"I, Faye , take you, Moe, to be my beloved husband, to have and to hold you, to honour you, to treasure you, to be at your side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times, and in the bad, and to love and cherish you always. I promise you this from my heart, for all the days of my life." No words I had ever said in my life meant more than these word right now. "I, Moe , take you, Faye, to be my beloved wife, to have and to hold you, to honor you, to treasure you, to be at your side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times, and in the bad, and to love and cherish you always. I promise you this from my heart, for all the days of my life." "Now you may kiss the bride" announced the minister.

I was now Mrs Faye Pesce. Who would have guessed this little street urchin would become married to a Doctor and training as one as well. I would never forget how hard it was to live on a bench but I wouldn't change it either. Sounds like an odd thing to say but I believe people are tested in life and some more than other, as the saying goes what doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. Only you can change your life no one is going to do it for you, yes you can ask for help along the way but ultimately you have to be the one to fight for what you want in life. And I fought hard.

The reception was wonderful, there wasn't many of us but we had a blast laughing and joking. I played a little bit of the guitar and sucked which made everyone laugh harder. I was so happy so why was I still feeling sick and exhausted. I tried to hide my yawns but Moe caught me. "We're not boring you are we" he laughed "no I'm fine it's just been a busy day" He looked concerned, I knew it right then I wasn't hiding it as well as I thought. "What wrong Faye, I know your not feeling well, you've been sleeping a lot lately and not eating much, your worrying me" "Moe don't be worried, it's just been the wedding and work, I'll be fine." Next thing I knew he went all doctor on me. I tried to protest but he was having none of it. As soon as I finished telling him exactly how I felt and all my symptoms he started grinning. "Why are you grinning at me?" " I can't be certain until I do a test but I think you pregnant." WHAT??? don't get me wrong it's not like I wasn't happy but I had no idea if I would be a good mum, what was a good mum? 

He was right, the very next day I took a test and there it was two blue little lines pulsating like a beacon. OH god oh god oh god, a wave of happiness mixed with impending doom washed over me. I put my hand on my stomach and made a promise to my little one right there. "I might not always get things right but I promise I will always love you and let you know it everyday."  The months of my pregnancy where filled with reading baby book and buying baby things. Moe would come home everyday from work and talk and listen to the baby. We decided we wanted to know the sex of the baby so we could decorate and because I had no patience at all. It was a boy! then the next couple of months were filled with arguing over the baby name. Everything he picked I hated and everything I picked he hated.

Also the house was filled with noise from building a second floor and re-decorating for the baby but the end results were so worth it. I finally had a proper living room and the bedrooms were moved upstairs. The baby's room was so cute with it's animal theme I couldn't wait to see him playing in here. Just as everything started to settle down and things became quiet my water's broke. I flew into a panic and Moe wasn't any better but somehow we made to the hospital without forgetting anything. As I gave birth I could here Bob Dylan playing in the back ground. We knew what to call him now.

Dylan Pesce was born 17th Oct 2010 weighing 7lb 1oz. I can not describe the feelings I had when I first looked into his eyes. The overwhelming love I had for him from the very second he was born was amazing. He was perfect and I couldn't imagine life without him even though he had only just arrived. As tears of happiness streamed down my face as he stared up at me. Moe put his arms around us and kissed us both. I left the next day, I could wait to get him home.

That night as I lay him down in his cot, I sat and told him a story of a girl who had nothing and now had the most precious thing in the world. Every night I watched him sleep and knew I would be a good mother as a mother is someone who loves and protects you but also makes sure your ready for the world when you grow up. I would make sure of that. I can't wait to see where life takes me next.

Chapter 7 Out Soon

Homeless Challenge Rules

If you are wanting to do the homeless challenge yourself you can find the rules Here .

Glitzyangel also has some fantastic houses, sims, other challenge rules and also some really helpful information on the Corrupt Doll

Chapter 5 Sometimes You Have No Control

Chapter 5 

After about two hours I started to get really tired, I'd had such a long day but I really didn't want to leave Mia alone with Moe. She spent the entire time laugh and joking about things that I wasn't involved in because I'd only just started working at the hospital. In the end I had to go I was just so tired and I had to be up for work. As I was saying good night to Moe, Mia turned to me and said "See you at work in the morning, they'll be loads of fun stuff for you to learn tomorrow" She said this in such a sickly sweet way but I knew what she really meant, she was gonna make my life hell. On the way home in the taxi I couldn't help feeling like I just wanted to go back to my bench.

Looking at the hospital the next day was nothing like the day before. I was so excited yesterday and now all I felt was dread. What was Mia gonna cook up for me, what awful things was she gonna make me do or do to me. I looked at the jobs I had to do today and I was right, everything on there way the jobs other people didn't want. Fine. I thought I'll do them and I wont complain, in fact I'll make out I'm really enjoying myself. It was another exhausting day but I was determined to look like nothing bothered me. The classes were the best part of work as Moe was teaching and Mia wasn't there. I had been working there for a while and actually enjoying myself when my next bombshell happen. Mia found out about my homeless past. Oh no how on earth had she found out, right then I knew it wouldn't be long before Moe found out. It was over I was never gonna get him now and things had been going so well.

I was right, Mia spread the information about my homelessness all round the hospital. It was a Wednesday and I was going to have to endure peoples whispers and comments for the rest of the week. The worst part was I felt Moe was avoiding me. I lost count of how many times I ran into the toilets to cry. I also couldn't believe how nasty people could be. The only person who would talk to me was Mary. On Friday I left work and had just got in the house when the door bell went. It was Moe. "I'm so sorry Faye it's all my fault" His fault what was he on about "what's your fault?" "That everyone knows" OK now I was confused "I always knew about your past, when we hire people a background check is done and I thought I was being nice telling Mia so she would ease up on you but I just made things worse" He'd always known, I felt so angry. "Why didn't you say anything to me? I feel like such an idiot. Was that why you hired me, did you feel sorry for me?" "What? no. I hired you because I thought you were right for the job. There are loads of people in the hospital profession that have had some kind of past, it makes them more compassionate towards others, I think." "oh. But why tell Mia she is such a Bit.." He cut me off "She's not that bad... well at least I thought she wasn't that bad but she's always had a thing for me and I've never felt the same way so when you came along she just got nasty" "Why would she get nasty with me though? It's not like we've ever done anything together" "Ah that would be because she knows I like you." YES!!! He likes me. I felt so giddy. "I told Mary to send you with that file so I could ask you out but I was just so nervous and then Mia showed up and then after that I didn't know how to ask you"

Just then I don't know what came over me, I just kissed him, it wasn't even a little kiss it was a full on kiss. I think I shocked him but then I felt him relax and he kissed me back. That night we sat and talked about everything and anything. He told me why he had decided to become a doctor, his mum had died of cancer when he was really young and his dad had suffered two heart attacks when he was in medical school. I told him everything about my mum and Lou. He listen to everything and just held me. It was so nice to be so close to someone. It had been nice to confide in Lewis but with Moe I felt really safe in his arms. The next few months was perfect I had the most wonderful boyfriend, work was going well and I came top of my class and the hospital decided to pay for full on training so I could be a medical intern. Mia was furious I couldn't help feeling sorry for her, she really wanted to be with someone who didn't want her and I had him, plus she couldn't boss me around any more.

After being together for 6 months we decided to move in together. We chose to move into my house because I'd put so much work into it. I even got him to sort out his hair, it would drive me mad when it would fall in to eyes and he was forever messing with it. I liked his shorter do a lot more as I loved to see his eyes. Life couldn't have been more perfect, I was so in love. Everyday Moe would do something to make me feel special. He was always bringing me flowers and writing me little poems, they were so cheesy but I loved them and would find them hidden in places like my underwear draw or on post-it notes stuck to the shower or the fridge. Lewis had even started talking to me again and was actually happy that I'd found Moe although he would never come to the house. I think he was still upset but didn't want me to know and meeting Moe might have really upset him. Just as I thought things couldn't get any better...

Moe asked me to marry him. I was so shocked but I knew my answer. I loved him so much of course I wanted to marry him. He put the ring on my hand, oh it was so beautiful, a diamond surrounded by pink sapphires. I jumped into his arms and whispered yes. "The day you walked into my office I knew you were the one, you have made me the happiest man alive. I love you Faye." "I love you too" and I kissed him. "The ring belonged to my mother, my dad gave it me when I told him I wanted to marry you" "Moe it's beautiful and it's good to know that your dad likes me enough to allow me to have it" I laughed."Likes you, he thinks you wonderful, he tells me all the time he can't believe your with me" he laughed back.

The next few weeks was all about planning the wedding. I had no idea what to do you I was reading magazines all the time. I couldn't believe how much the average wedding cost $20,000 Oh. My. God. We decided as I had no family and he had very little that it was just going to be a small wedding so there was no way we were gonna spend that much. We would sit playing chess chatting about all the strange stories in the magazines I'd read "Don't worry I wont turn into bridezilla on you" "I just want it to be perfect and to be perfect all I need is you at the alter on our wedding day, I don't even care if your wearing a bin bag" he laughed "oh good then because I've seen the perfect bin bag in the market the other day" I joked back. "Ah ha check, beat that" OK I will "Check mate!" He could never beat me "damn thought I had you that time".

It was about a week before my wedding when I came home to find my mother in my house. She had broken in and was searching my house, obviously for money. "What are you doing here get out of my house" "is that anyway to speak to your mother" she slurred "you smell like a brewery and I can speak to you how I want, you don't know the meaning of the word mother" I spat at her. Just then she came into hug me "Faye, don't say things like that your my baby I love you" "How dare you say things like that, you don't love me you only love yourself, if you loved me you would have treated me better" "Oh come on Faye don't be so dramatic" "WHAT? dramatic? I'm being dramatic over the fact that you never cared for me one day in your life and you let Lou beat me every chance he got. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE" 

Just then I slapped her across the face. I don't know what came over me, I couldn't believe I'd done it but I wasn't going to let her see that I was just as shocked as she was. "I should have had an abortion you nasty little..." "Get out of my house now!" I said as calmly as I could. She left and I sat on the couch shaking until Moe got home. I told him all about what had happened, he was so angry that she had dared to come here but sounded impressed when I told him about slapping her. "I know how bad your family is but you have me now and we are going to have the best life ever from now on. I promise you that we'll have the biggest family if you want and our kids will have the best mum in the world" He always knew what to say to make me feel better.

The next day I felt awful. I don't know if it was what had happened the day before or I genuinely was ill. I was just about to get ready to go to worked when I ran into the bathroom and threw up. I had to phone in sick. In all the time I had worked I hadn't phoned in sick I felt terrible letting them down. "Stop worrying about it sweetheart, you just rest and get better" Moe kissed me on the cheek and tucked my in bed. He sat stroking my hair until the carpool arrived for him. I knew right then that no matter what happened I would always have Moe to take care of me. 

My Creations

Sorry not Story related but I do enjoy making and redesigning stuff so here are a few of my creations

The D'Eath's have lived for a very long time. The Entire Family was changed into vampires in the early 1800's Damion the Father was changed first and decided to bring his wife, Drucilla and children, Elivira and Ebenezer over to the world of the Undead. They create destruction and mayhem wherever they go. Evil isn't a strong enough word to describe them. 

http://www.thesims3.com/assetDetail.html?assetId=3242568

The Funky Collection

Funky Jeans

http://www.thesims3.com/assetDetail.html?assetId=3244698

Funky Ripped Top v2

http://www.thesims3.com/assetDetail.html?assetId=3244700

Funky Ripped Top

http://www.thesims3.com/assetDetail.html?assetId=3244701

Neon Ripped Top

http://www.thesims3.com/assetDetail.html?assetId=3244696

Blue Ripped Jeans

http://www.thesims3.com/assetDetail.html?assetId=3244696

Chapter 4 A New Beginning

Even thought this was a Homeless Challenge and I've completed it I am still going to continue Faye's story as I have enjoyed writing it, also some people have asked me to continue.

For the Challenge purposes here are my points

Lifetime Rewards 53.769 - 53 points - 1 point for every 1000 LTR

3 x friends - 9 - 3 point for every friend/lover etc. 

Skills - 37 - 1 point for every skill learnt

2 x Maxed Skills Gardening and Fishing - 10 - 5 points for each skill maxed 

Total - 109 

Time to complete challenge 7 sims wks and 5 days 

Chapter 4 A New Beginning

I couldn't believe it when I worked it out. I have actually done it, I have raised enough money to buy a house of my own. I don't think I could have done it anywhere else, this place had been perfect and I knew the second I arrived here I felt at home. Oddly I was sad to let my little park go but to have a house I could call my own was amazing. That morning Lewis had taken me to City Hall to sort out my ID thankfully I had my birth certificate or it would have taken ages to sort out and he used his address so I wouldn't have to explain where I had been living. I had already seen the perfect house months ago and it was still empty because it was so small but for my it was fantastic. As I already had the money and didn't need a loan the estate agent couldn't wait to get the ball rolling. I was a able to move in when ever I wanted. It also still had some furniture in it too.

Like I said my house, wow my house, was perfect for me. The view looked out onto the sea just what I liked and there was a lovely little garden next to the house that was perfect for my fruit and veg. Inside there was 1 bedroom and bathroom and a living area attached to the kitchen. OK the decorating was a little dated but I could always get to that later. 

1st thing I did was cook mac and cheese. It was so nice being able to make my own meals on a stove instead of a BBQ pit. Then I grabbed the bag of clothes I had just bought myself. Everything in there was pink, I had to laugh at myself, I always thought I hated the colour pink but I think that was because there was no point in me wearing it. Everything I wore would get dirty on the streets so I keeps to dark colours. Now I could wear the most girliest things and found myself buying all the girly clothes in the shop. I had also bought a brush, this was the most difficult task of all, getting a brush through my hair. I never brushed it there was no point but finally I got all the knots and tangles out and put it up in a clip. I had even bought some make-up and put that on. After adding a few bits of jewellery I stared at myself in the mirror. I didn't recognise myself but I liked what I saw, for once I actually looked human ha! I had also bought myself some new bedroom furniture, one thing I wanted to be was comfortable when I slept and I still have some money left. It was the 1st room I done up in the house and I loved it. 

Next thing on my list was to find a job. I loved selling my fruit and veg and probably still would but I wanted a proper job where I had co-workers but who on earth would hire me. I had no qualification, work experience or references, in fact I'd never had a job. I searched the newspapers and the internet but every job I was no good for. Finally I came across a job at the hospital. They were looking for people who wanted to learn and no experience was necessary, yay, I rang immediately. The woman took my details and told me to come for an interview on Monday.

I was so nervous, they were never gonna hire me I just knew it. I was sat with about 8 other people and to my horror everyone was in their teens. Oh no this was gonna end bad but I sat up straight and acted as if I knew what I was doing. I didn't I just want to crawl into a hole. When I went in for the interview it was a young man by the name of Moe Pesce. He smiled at me and told me to sit down. "So Faye Dunsten, is it?" I nodded "I appear not to have your CV, did they not tell you to bring one?" A what? "I'm sorry this must seem rather silly of me not to know what your on about but this would be the 1st job I've gone for" He looked at me shocked "Oh... well a CV is a curriculum vitae and its a list of your previous jobs so... Anyway if this is your 1st job application, I take it you were a stay at home mum or housewife" "Errm no... I was selling fruit and veg that I grew and some fish and... I'm probably not what your looking for I'm sorry I'll go" I started to get up and leave, I felt completely embarrassed. "Miss Dunsten this job is for people who want to learn, previous experience isn't necessary, do you want to learn?" I turned back round but didn't sit "yes I do but I was looking at all the other applicants and I look a little bit older than them so I just though" "We are a teaching hospital and yes most of are applicants to tend to be teenagers but we do get older applicants" I finally sat back down and went on with the interview. I couldn't tell you what happened after that because I have no idea but somehow later that night the phone rang and I got the job.

I was to start work the next week I couldn't wait. While I was sorting some other things out for my house Lewis came to visit, I hadn't seen him since I moved in, he had been having problems with his wife and was trying to sort things out. He seemed his normal jolly self and kept complimenting me on how well I looked but something felt off about him. Then he spun round and said the most shocking thing on the planet "Faye why don't I take you on a date, I like you a lot and your single how about it" I couldn't speak, he was my best friend I didn't feel that way about him. Finally I chocked out "but your married" "not any more, Preethi was cheating on me and it was over ages ago I just didn't want to admit it, so what do you say" Oh this was bad, very bad. "Lewis I... really... Lewis your my friend my BEST friend I love you to pieces but I don't feel that way about you" I just blurted it out, I wanted to be gentle but I didn't know how.

"Oh that just great thanks Faye" He spat out. "I didn't mean you hurt you Lewis but I had no idea you had feelings for me I'm so sorry" then his face just fell and he looked so sad. "It's not your fault of course you didn't know I just hoped you felt the same way too." At that moment I wished that I did just so I didn't have to see that look on his face. He had been the best thing in my life and had helped me so much but all I saw his s was a friend. He felt more like a big brother, I hated myself right then but there was nothing I could do. "I'm just gonna leave. Err.. just give me a while OK" "We are still friends arn't we" I felt horrible saying it but I couldn't loose him. "of course, yes I just need some time to deal" with that he left. 

Over the next few days I felt terrible, all I wanted to do was ring him but I knew I had to wait for him to ring me. Thankfully the week went fast and it was Monday, I was starting my new job. I was so excited, the carpool picked me up at 8am, I'd been up since 6am making myself look good. The guy in the car worked in the business part of the hospital and he was so boring. I couldn't tell you his name even if I tried to remember. He had this monotone voice that just bore in to my head and kept going on about accounts. Sheesh what was it about accounts that floated his boat so much. Just as I thought I could actually jump out of a moving car to save dying of boredom the hospital came into view. Oh thank god.

 I practically bolted from the car to escape but then I came to the front doors and had to stop to take it in. I worked here I actually had a job, I was so proud of myself at that point, I was a functioning member of society. I had a little giggle to myself and went inside.  Dr Pesce, my boss, met me once I changed into my uniform. He gave me a tour of the hospital and told me what things I would be doing and which classes I had. "Most of it you will learn while you work but something's have to be written down. I know boring but you only have to do a couple of afternoons a week" Oh he was lovely, he was really young for a doctor, he didn't look that much older than me, he was really funny and everyone around him just loved him. I think I had my 1st crush and it was my boss, I felt so silly. The day was so hectic I tried my best to keep up but sometimes I just found things to hard. One of the nurse's Mia Rao took an instant dislike to me and I could hear her saying all kinds of horrible things about me. Just as I thought things couldn't get worse Mia passed me a bag of rubbish that I'm sure she knew was about to... it exploded all over me. I was covered in blood and other bodily fluids, I wanted to be sick and to make matters worse there was Dr Pesce to see me looking so gross. After I had showers it was time to go home. As I was about to leave Mary Soto the Staff Nurse stopped me and told me I'd done well, even when Mia had played that trick on me I handle myself very well. I knew it. Mary was a wonderful lady and I thanked her for her kind words. Then she passed me a file and said Dr Pesce had left it and he would need it and could I drop it off at his house.

I was so nervous about going to his house, I'd had such a horrible day and the last thing I needed was to see him after today's mess. I walked up to his house slowly and willed myself to ring the door bell. "Hello" he said with a bright smile on his face "Mary said you left this file at work and you'd need it so she asked if I could drop it off" "Oh yes thank you, come in" Come in? he was just being friendly, calm down Faye. His house wasn't that much bigger than mine and it looked like he'd not been here long. He offered me a drink and we got talking. We had a lot in common and we chatted about all sorts. "It's rare you come across a girl who likes fishing, I absolutely love fishing but I never get the chance, I'm a bit of a workaholic" I didn't dare tell him the reason I got into fishing was because I was homeless and needed cash. In fact it was the one thing I really didn't want him to know. We had been chatting for a while when the door went

It was Mia. I couldn't believe it, I wanted to scratch her face off. She looked at me in total discussed and then ignore me and started talking to Moe. Urrg it was disgusting watching her throw herself at him. I thought about leaving but there was no way I was leaving her with him. I was determined that she was not going to get him. When it was obvious I wasn't going anywhere Mia's flirting got worse. I was never very good a flirting so I had no idea what I was going to but this meant War. I was going to have him not her.

Chapter 3 Sometimes Life is So Unfair

I would just like to say sorry to those of you who have been waiting for chapter 3. Unfortunately I have been unwell over the weekend and was unable to get this out on the day I wanted . So, finally, here it is.

Chapter 3

"Lewis please I'm begging you, I need this place. I've set everything up just right, please don't tell anyone" Suddenly his face relax and then he looked at me completely confused "Why on earth would I tell anyone Faye, I want to help you not run you out of town" OK now it was my turn to look confused "but you keep telling me I was terrible" "I didn't say that I said IT was terrible, you can't stay here on a bench in a park, look I have a spare room at my house you can stay there until you are on your feet" I could feel my heartbeat finally start to slow down, oh thank god, he was just concerned. I smiled at him, I could tell he really just wanted to help me. This was an odd feeling most people I met just wanted to help themselves "Lewis I really appreciate what your trying to do but I like it here, I have my garden and my fish and for once in my life I am doing things for myself" "but you must be freezing out here" I don't think he could grasp that I was actually fine. "Believe me it's not as cold as you think. I have a good thing going here, people are buying my fruit, veg and fish and I'm always finding stuff that sells for a good price" He suddenly cut in "find things?" "Oh no I don't steal things, well only if I need to too for food or warmth and I've not had to do that here, well there was that once but I'm gonna pay them back I promise" I didn't think I should tell him the whole story I felt ashamed already. "I know your concerned, I really appreciate that but do you think you could just be a friend, I'm really proud of what I have done here and if I accept your offer I will feel like I've given up, it may not make sense you but I need this" 

He laughed "you're a stubborn one arn't you, of course I'm your friend I would be here if I wasn't" He then pulled me into a hug, at first I didn't know what to do, I was a little shocked, normally when a guy had hugged me he wanted something else but with Lewis it was just a friendly hug. I relaxed a little and hugged him back. The strangest thing in all this was I was actually using the word friend, you don't get to make friends when your homeless most people just stay away thinking you have some kind of disease. We sat a chatted for a while and he told me about all the things he had done while he was on the street for drugs and why, even after he had cleaned himself up he thought it was best he moved away for a fresh start "Somethings people just can't forgive you for and some people just want to drag you back down" I then told him about my mum and Lou, why it was easier on the streets and as much as I could about my real dad. As he was leaving he turned and passed me a cellphone "What?" "Faye I know you want to do this on your own but I'd never forgive myself if you needed help urgently and you couldn't get any. It's an old phone all you can do with it is make and receive phone calls nothing fancy. Please take it, if only to put my mind at rest"  I took it and out it in my pocket "Thank you" He hugged me again and left.

I was working so hard all the time to get the money I needed. On top of my garden the fishing and gem hunting I was clipping every coupon I could find to save money on food, catching bugs to deliver to the science lab and that was asking a lot because I hate bugs, and doing the very thing I detested the most which was rummaging though trash cans. It was disgusting but some of the stuff people threw out, once clean or fixed, would get me extra money and sometimes quite a bit. Unfortunately I was so busy that I would get so tired and even that lovely shower in the main park wasn't enough to get me to get up off that bench. It was getting worrying, I was even falling asleep in the day which was a good way of getting caught. I had to sort myself out.

I remembered seeing in one of the news papers a coupon for a manicure, it would only cost me $25 so I went and had a shower and made myself look as neat as possible and made my way to the Spa. Everything inside was so shiny and clean, I felt very out of place but the beautician called my name before I could change my mind and leave. She chatted away and asked me things about my life and if I was going on holiday, never actually caring about the answer but asked anyway as it was part of the job to keep up small talk. After that I kept up the day of fun. I went to the pool area where they had loads of stuff for tourists to use. I had a good look through the telescope but when it focused in on a fat my in speedos on the beech I decided to leave that activity alone before I lost my lunch. Everyone just though I was another tourist so I played foosball and chatted with everyone, it was nice to just be accepted and not avoided.

After such a wonderful day it was back to the hard work but I promised myself to treat myself every so often so I wouldn't get run down again. One night I was fishing when the phone Lewis gave me rang. I leapt out of my skin, I'd forgotten I had it. When I finally calmed down and answered the phone. At the other end was a man who sounded very frantic, all I could get from him at first was a delivery hadn't arrived and he needed veg fast. I asked him to calm down a bit so I could understand him and he scream the Big Bloody Ship on the beech get here quick, you will be paid well just get here and slammed the phone down. I grabbed every piece of veg I had and got there as soon as I could. I went in and got told to go round back. A guy very red and very flustered came at me and grab the box of veg looked through it and smiled "Ah Lewis was right about you, thank you" he shoved a wad of money in my hands and disappeared. I stood outside not quite sure what had happened. So Lewis had given him my name, I wanted to be mad at him but when I thought about it he hadn't done anything wrong. He had just told someone I sold fruit and veg and the guy rung me when he was desperate. 

The next day I rang Lewis to thank him. It was the only number I had saved in the phone. After a little chat he asked me why I had never been to City Hall to find out about my dad. I had tried but without ID and an address I couldn't prove who I was and they weren't allowed to give out information on people without proof. I'd settled for when I finally got a place of my own and sorting out my life I could get back to that. We said goodbye and I continued what I was doing. About half an hour later he rang back "meet me at the library" "What? why?" "Just meet me at the library" I finished up and went to the library.

When I arrived he was stood over at the looking through the reference section. He turned with a big grin on his face. "You said your dad's name was Philip Jackson, well I was in here the other day looking up on some local history for a friend of mine when I came across his name. Turns out he was the towns greatest footballer, the town loved him. I'm sure if we look through some other newspapers we'll be able to find more on him. being a small town he was probably front page new quite often." Wow. "where do we start looking" "go upstairs there is loads of computers just search for the newspapers around that time" 

It was true he was in loads of newspapers. He was always the one to get the winning goal in, he was helpful in the community and straight A student, he was perfect.Then the more I read the more I wish I hadn't. The stories changed from local hero to town disappointment. At first he just became less and less in the community and shunning friends and family. Then he gave up football to get himself a job and soon dropped out of school and took on several jobs. There were always stories of how everyone was so disappointed in him as he has so much going for him and no one could understand why. There was also stories about how he couldn't handle the pressure and just gave up but I worked it out, just as all this started happening would have been the time my mum was pregnant with me. Then there was nothing in the pages for ages, I was about to give up when the last newspaper I came across was LOCAL BOY DRUNKEN CAR CRASH HELL. I don't know why but I just knew it was about him. I was right, he had gotten so drunk that he had driven his car into and on coming truck. I felt ill. I was never going to know him. I made myself read on. I found out in news papers not long after his death that his father died of a heart attack and his mum had moved to a town called Twinbrooke to live with her daughter after a mental breakdown. I also found out my dad was buried not that far from here. 

As soon as Lewis saw my face he knew it wasn't good. I told him what I had found out. "I am so sorry Faye, I thought I was giving you good news and now I've made everything worse" "It's OK Lewis I'm glad I know but I just wish I had been able to meet him. He's buried not that far from here would you please take me" "of course! do you want to go now?" "yes I think I need to see it to believe it" The car ride was so quite I just felt so down. 

We searched round and eventually found it next to the mausoleum. I couldn't believe it I had walked passed this grave so many times going into the mausoleum, under it was some catacombs that had all kinds of gems and metals I would sell, it gave me chills just thinking about it. "Faye, do you want me to stay with you or do you want to be on your own" "I think I'd like to be on my own, thank you for bring me" "I could wait in the car if you want" "No, it's OK I'll make my own way home" Off he went and there I was alone with my dad.

I didn't know what to do but then out of nowhere I just burst into tears, I hadn't cried in years but all of a sudden it was like I was crying for every time I held it back. All I could think was all that time I was eventually gonna find my dad and he would take me in a make everything OK again and now he couldn't he was dead. I would never find out if he ever wanted me or if he loved me, I suddenly felt very alone. I sat on the floor in front of his grave, I started to talk to him as if he was right in front of me and told him everything about my life. In the end I promised I'd visit as much as I could, even if it was just to tell him about my day. I was determind now more than ever that I was going to get a house, I needed my ID so I could get the information I needed from City Hall. I wanted to find out more about what had happened, maybe I could find my Aunt and Grandma, I needed some answers.